Larry recently commented on my Easter post and said that he and I had both married out of our league. He's right. We both did. This picture was taken on the last day of the summer of 1995, when Jen and I began dating. It sits in my office as a constant reminder of the mess that rolled into camp that summer (me) and the gem that he rolled into (Jen) and the incredible grace it took on her part to reach down and date, let alone marry, the little boy lost that was Drew Forster at that time in my life.But that comment gives rise to a theory that I've held for a while and what better place to float theories for acceptance or severe public humiliation than my (sometimes sleeping) blog.
So here goes -- Drew's Theory on Marriage & Gender.
It is impossible for a man to marry down. A man always marries up, always gets more in a wife than he deserves. If this is true, the reverse must also be true, that it is the rare occurrence, if ever that a woman marries up. If the theory is true, a woman always stoops, always marries down.
So to Larry's comment, it is not possible to make the statement: "She married out of her league" because social status and physical appearance and all of the superficial elements aside, we as guys never deserve the woman we get to spend the rest of our lives with. That's what the rest of our life is about, trying to live up to the standard of the woman we proposed to. Why do you think we kneel down to do it?
So the theory's out there. Look forward to your comments on it.
10 comments:
I'll buy that.
So what did you do this time?
;o)
You guys are awesome!! Your wives are blessed. What a great picture Drew! My parents met at camp wonderland and my Dad would say he married up too.
AMEN!!!!!!!! I look at my wife everyday and think, "Why has she hung out with me for the past 25 years?" I would blog about the first time I rode in Janet's car. I am not sure that I would want to embarrass myself or her for that matter, by publishing my stupidity on the internet.
Tell Jen, "Hello."
While I can see some truth in your theory - Paige makes me better.
However, I think there's a danger here that we let ourselves off the hook by praising the virtue of the fairer sex. Sure, the most present, most motivating person in our lives to spur us on to improvement is typically our attractive and spunky and faithful wife. But we've got to own the responsibility to improve in character, kindness and faith for ourselves, too.
Jeff and all,
Well said. For the unitiated, my brother is ten times the written communicator I am and really ought to be writing a blog or in some other format.
I think this is true, that we need to improve ourselves and not cop out. It comes down to Nicholson to Helen Hunt in As Good As it Gets "You make me want to be a better man." It's not just about these tremendous women we've married, but that intrinsically, there is a way in which our marriages inspire a desire to change, to be a better person.
And then there's Jesus.
Gosh, I sure don't look anytying like a great communicator with my completely unedited blog comment. Ew, sentence fragments and ill use of however. I blame the medium.
Well I will definately and everyone in one great big sigh. "I married up, up, up." Almost as high as up will go. Susanne is awesome, as Larry said I have no idea why would she hang out with me. She is awesome and wonderful and I thank God everyday for her
I most definitely married up. In so many ways Sheryl "makes me want to be a better man".
It would be interesting to hear more female perspective on this, 'cuz I doubt (or at least wonder) that our wives would view themselves has having married down (despite some caveman-esque stories I'm sure they all have on us)... what was their motivation?
And was marrying up the motivation for us guys, or was that simply the outcome of something much deeper?
Interesting theory.
They have no choice. Sooner or later they just choose the best available around them and go for it.
Being a single Christian guy surrounded by single Christian women is like having a 1-in-5 shot at the lottery. You just can't beat those odds!
Maybe women have a greater ability to see what we have the potential to be, and that especially in Christ Jesus. Beth inspires me to "be a better man" in my walk.
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