Pressing in

STANDARD PARENTAL STORY DISCLAIMER: For those readers who are not parents, the following post will involve a story of a child-parent relationship related to larger issues of life. It's the kind of analogy parents are always making that can become extremely annoying particularly to those who do not have children. I do, however, have children and so I will tell the story anyway. Deal or stop reading now.

It doesn't happen too much these days, but a little while ago, especially during the year in which Riley was 2 and a half to 3 and a half years old, she would occasionally get very clingy. Not in the usual sort of "I need you Mommy or Daddy" way that kids get into, but in an excited, "I just need to be close to you all the time" kind of way. This would manifest itself often at restaurants when either Jen or I would be sharing one side of a booth with her. Though there was plenty of space for an adult and a toddler to occupy comfortably, she would press herself up against us, not allowing us to move or eat or speak without being aware of Riley's presence on our elbow, in our ribcage, pushing against our shoulder. She didn't need us to do anything but let her be that close, wasn't looking for comfort in a specific way. She just needed extreme proximity.

When a newborn or an infant wants to be close, we tend to put up with it and truly to enjoy it most of the time. When a toddler does it, at least to me, I can take it for a bit, but then I feel so encumbered, so weighed down by her pressing on me, annoyed, distracted, not at ease. I am itching for her to find some other distraction and just give me some space.

Lately, I've really been pressing into God. Depending on Him in a way that I haven't for a long time. It's just occured to me that this is another one of those similarity/difference situations in God the Father's relationship with us. We do sometimes exactly what Riley did to us: we press in to God, needing comfort, excited to be in His presence, depending on the weight of who He is to hold us up. There's the similarity. Here's the difference: He doesn't get weighed down. He is not annoyed. He is still high and lofty and loving and compassionate and so trustworthy. He is more at ease when we press into Him. He is ill at ease when we ignore Him, patronize Him or humor Him with our affection. And because there is no end to Him, we can press in and press in and press in and find no resistance, at least from Him. There's always more of Him for us to experience, to depend on.